Hi there,

Thank you for your comment. Trust me you are not alone in this.
There are many women that experience this.

By sharing your experience you remind us all how something like this greatly impacts the quality of our lives. We all deserve to live happy, healthy lives.

Keep doing your research and feel free to ask any questions that might be helpful.
I am here for you!

Hi Susan,

Thank you for your comment. It is kind of you to share your experience and opinion.

Almost 100% of the women that have a labiaplasty are not doing it for anyone, but themselves. It is so important that we feel happy with our bodies and our choices. Regardless of what anybody thinks.

In the end, if our bodies are not working for us, cause pain or discomfort, options are available to help create a healthier existence. Not to please other people.

Only we know what we experience firsthand (good, bad or indifferent). And therefore like you, only we can decide what is right for us...

Thanks for sharing!

Hi IamSad,

Thanks for sharing. You are not alone.

Most women do not have these procedures for anybody but themselves.

Fact is, most men won't care at all. And those that do aren't the ones you need to be having sex with.

In my experience, if you are happy with yourself, then your boyfriend will be also...if not, time for a new boyfriend.

Good Luck!

Vanessa

Hi Cynthia,

Thank you for sharing your personal experience. Very nice to hear that the size of your labia does not cause you any pain or discomfort. As you know, unfortunately that is not the case with all women.

In regards to the laser hair removal, they typically do not laser the labia minora (because of pigment). But you should not have any trouble because of the size.

Hope that helps! And congrats on your Prince Charming.

Best wishes.

Hello Melissa,

Thank you for reaching out. This is actually more common for young girls her age because of puberty. As our bodies change chemically and estrogen levels increase, so does the size of the labia.

The youngest female I knew that received this procedure was 13. Her parents were involved and this was not done for cosmetic reasons either. She was suffering from terrible pain.

My advice would be to see a specialist. If you need help, I have a doctor or two that would probably be the most appropriate for this. And though the likelihood is slim, if there is enough evidence to support that this is "medically necessary", you may be able to submit to insurance because of her age.

Please let me know if you have other questions.

Hi Hokllhp,

Thanks for your comment. Your girlfriend having larger labia is not due to her having sex with different guys. The size of labia is affected by hormonal changes in the body, weight gain, genetics, pregnancy, etc.

If you are concerned with her being faithful, you should discuss that with her. From my experience, multiple sexual partners do not determine the size of a female's labia.

Hope this helps!

Hi Ella,

Appreciate you taking the time to comment.  Although I'm not sure you read the post clearly.  

If you had, you would have noticed that I do not "encourage surgery" nor tell women that "labiaplasty is the way to go".  And I certainly cannot make you feel inferior.  Only you can choose to feel that way.

It is unfortunate and sad that you are as conflicted about your body as you are and resent others for a self-imposed belief.

You claim that it is "not a woman's choice for herself to get this done."  I would strongly disagree. Whose choice is it?

Similar to breast reduction, nobody is forcing anybody to have these surgeries. This is not circumcision. These procedures exist as options to improve their quality of life, not because there is a right or wrong way to be or look.

I have spoken to many men (like your husband) that see all labia as beautiful.  If you don't, again, that is your choice. But it is unfair to criticize or describe women as "grotesque" because you do not like the way labia look.

In the end, whether or not you agree with labiaplasty is irrelevant.  The fact is there are thousands of women researching this surgery and looking for help every single day.  My site provides them information they can't get anywhere else so they can make decisions that are best for them (whether for or against surgery).

This is a safe place for them to get answers and not be JUDGED for having those questions.

And as long as women continue to benefit from this information, I will continue to provide it.

Unlike you, I believe a woman is strong enough and smart enough to make her own decisions and detest the suggestion that we women are weak and powerless.

The choice to make sound decisions about my body, is just that, my choice.  I would hardly call that "pushing" a surgical agenda.

Thank you again for sharing your opinion. I wish you the best and hope you find what makes you happy.

Hi Jay,

Thank you for your comment and for sharing your opinion. As the post points out, there are many men and women that love large labia.

The information on this site is for educational purposes and for women, not for men or about what turns you on.

And though as a man you believe you are helping women by expressing your opinion, a woman's body does not serve only to satisfy a man's sexual needs.

It is her body and these issues are not for you to dictate what is best for a woman, based on YOUR needs.

No different than if your wife were on a site suggesting she wished your scrotum were larger and longer, because that is what SHE liked.

If your scrotum caused you pain, discomfort or hygiene issues because of its size, is it not YOUR right to choose to do something about it?

Or should you disregard what you feel because it turned on your wife??

Just curious...

Hi Alyssa,

Thank you for your comment.

Regardless of what anyone thinks about your body, you should never consider this or any procedure for ANYBODY ELSE.

Labiaplasty or any other surgery considered to be elective are options to improve the quality of YOUR life, not to satisfy a boyfriend or gain someone else's acceptance.

If he or anyone does not like the body you love, then they should definitely be seeing the door instead!

Hi Allison,

Thank you for your comment and being willing to share your experience. As you know, you are not alone.

The truth is you are very young and your body will continue to change. As your body matures, so will your mind. What you see as different now, may actually be what you see makes you unique.

With that said, though there are women that choose to have labioplasty for the appearance, it should not done for someone else. Labioplasty is an option to help women feeling discomfort, physical pain, hygiene issues, etc. It should never be done for anyone else, but you.

As you have read here, there are many men and women that love labia (all sizes, and for some the larger the better). You need not feel there is "normal" size for labia, or that you are "different". We are all different, males and females. If labia surgery is something you choose, do it because it is about improving your life, not because you are concerned with pleasing somebody else.

If you consider labia reduction for somebody else or for fear of being rejected, it is best that you do not have any surgery period. Nobody will ever care more about this than you. Trust me on that.

Real men do not care about the size or look of your labia. And any guy lucky enough to be with you, will tell you the same. If you are happy with it, so will everyone else. :-)

Hope this helps. Please do not hesitate to contact me again with other questions.

Best wishes,

Vanessa Scott

Hi Penny,

Glad to hear that you are doing your research and are understanding there is no such thing as "normal". We are all normal and size is relative. What may be large to you, may not be large to anyone else.

At this point you are very young and your body will continue to change and develop. Do not concern yourself with "judgement". Most important is for you to see that there is nothing "wrong" with you or your body. Any boy that suggests otherwise, is just that, a boy. And is not worthy of you or your body.

We are all unique and beautiful in our own way!

Best wishes.

Hi Unsure,

Though you may feel different and embarrassed, keep in mind a couple of things.

One we are all unique. What you may think is "repulsive", others may find absolutely desirable. You are very young and your body is changing, growing and still developing (so will your mind and perspective).

To some other woman with labia that protrudes 3 inches, that experience physical pain and discomfort, your labia is desirable.

Allow your body to continue to change and trust that you are not the only one that has been self-conscious about your body. However, remember that we are all different and that is what makes you special.

Enjoy yourself and know that no one that matters will ever care more about your labia than you. :-)

Best wishes...

Vanessa

Hi Toni,

Thank you for sharing your experience.

Though seeing the doctor may not be the easiest thing for you to do, as your mom said, this is to get help. If what you describe regarding the labia pain is related to the size, by talking to your mother and seeing a doctor you will find out what can be done.

Normally, I suggest girls your age to wait for their bodies to finish developing before considering surgery, especially when one is concerned with the look or considering it because of "cosmetic" reasons. However, the young ladies I have worked with that did have labioplasty, had it for functional reasons (not because of the appearance). They had it because they were in constant pain and were not able to do the basic things you just described (or ride bikes, play in sports, etc.).

In the end this is about finding answers and options to what you are experiencing. Most important is to see what is going on with you and why you are experiencing such pain and discomfort.

If it turns out that the pain is being caused by the size of your labia, make sure your doctor knows what they are doing.

But do not stress yourself out. If this ends up being the right option for you now, remember you are not alone. It is great that you are able to talk with your mother and that she is helping you find the next step that is right for you.

Best wishes and blessings!

Vanessa

Hi Dorothy,

Thank you for your question.

As I shared with Toni, these are not surgeries that may be appropriate for a young girl your age. Especially because your body will continue to develop and grow. Though there are some exceptions and young ladies that start to experience great discomfort with normal everyday activity, you do run the risk that the tissue may not be done growing.

So this is not something that I can answer for you. If changing your clothing (less fitted, etc.), positions, does not help and the pain/discomfort is unbearable then this is something you have to determine. You mention that it does not "hurt too much", so it may be something that is being affected by your clothing and not necessarily the size.

Hope that this has helped your predicament some. Remember surgery is permanent and know that you are still developing and changing. Take your time to figure out what is best for you.

Best wishes!

Hi Mikespink?

Thank you for your comment. Appreciate you sharing and giving us all your evolved perspective.

You are a great reminder of how we come in all different shapes and sizes. And that ultimately if it is purely cosmetic, the size of labia is relative and so is beauty.

Thanks again!

Hi Nadine,

Thank you for your comment.

It is nice to hear where you are coming from and most importantly, that you are making choices for you and nobody else. As you said, this is your decision to make (whether for physical/emotional discomfort or purely cosmetic).

In the end, this is your body. No one can tell us what is right or wrong. As long as you are being smart about it (doing your research and making educated decisions), the choice is yours. And from what you have shared it sounds like you have.

We wish you all the best and appreciate you voicing your position and sharing your experience with us.

Best wishes,

Vanessa

Hi LC,

Thank you for sharing.

This study is one of the more comprehensive and as shared in the post it took place "many years ago".

Regardless of what "normal" in anyone's eyes or standards, what you are experiencing or describing is not accurate. There are plenty of men and women that love large labia.

In fact, there are sites dedicated to large labia (not for educational reasons) that display the love for large labia. It sounds like your sample group of male opinions is limited and really beside the point. Nobody can tell you what is right or wrong, good or bad, or even beautiful.

We are all unique and so are our bodies.

You definitely should not have surgery or even consider it for anybody else.

As you can read in the many comments left here, the views and opinions vary. REAL men do not care what the labia looks like.

Surgery is an option to help with comfort, function, hygiene and yes appearance, but it is not there to set any standard. The majority of women I speak with that do have surgery are doing it for themselves.

The choice is yours to make or not make.

Either way, the best thing for you to see is that nobody's opinion will ever matter more than yours (not mine, not the many men that do love large labia, nor any of your friends).

If that is not what you believe, then no surgery will change that.

Your body, your choice.

Surgery is not a magic pill, it is an option to improve the quality of one's life. But it definitely should never be about pleasing anybody, but the recipient.

Wishing you the best,

Vanessa

Hi LC,

Thanks for your comment and for sharing your opinion.

Although I respect your opinion, I do not agree with it. For you to group women in the "ALL women have elective surgeries because of males" category is not only incorrect & misinformed, it is really unfair.

I will not refute that some females AND males choose to alter their body to meet some standard they believe is beauty (whether because it is perceived or accepted as the norm), but that is a small subset. Again I interact with women from ALL over the world, not just the UK.

And to be fair, from my observations the UK does have a very young population that is concerned with labiaplasty and labia size. Not sure what that is all about because I do not live there (perhaps that you can get it free on the NHS & don't pay for it).

But even the "Myth of the Perfect Vagina" film is a very limited sample group. It only covers a few women from the UK. Certainly not scientific or even ample representation of the women having these procedures.

Unlike breast or rhinoplasty, nobody sees the size or shape of your labia/vulva more than YOU. Nobody, not even your partner.

It is unfair and inaccurate to suggest that ALL women are driven because they are trying to please anyone but themselves. You have accepted and bought the propaganda that labia should look a certain way. I do not believe that, nor do I think any strong woman making these choices for her body would appreciate that.

Not to discount what you are sharing, but to tell me that you allowed one tv program to "completely shatter your self-esteem" or convinced you that something was wrong with your labia is disheartening. Especially when there are millions of males & females that love labia (all sizes and all shapes).

How many women have you spoken with that had this procedure or males that are not your friends in the UK have you actually spoken to?

You do not have to accept anything I say or anything anybody else does for that matter. My goal is not to convince women they need labiaplasty or any "elective" surgery, my stand is for women to make EDUCATED & safe choices.

IF your issue is with the Channel 4 programming, perhaps that is something for you to take up with them. This site here, is dedicated to informing women of the risks and benefits of Vaginal surgery, not to promote it or defend it. This is a place women can get answers to questions, not to be convinced that Labioplasty is good or bad.

Any person considering surgery for the notion of acceptance or somebody else's ideals, SHOULD NOT have surgery, period!

We are all unique and different, that is not unattractive. You can not control what anybody else thinks, ever. All you can control is what YOU believe.

If you choose to accept what a tv program tells you, then you have allowed that. Whether you agree with me or not, we are responsible for what we accept or believe as truth. With that said, you are much more powerful than you are giving us women credit for.

Best wishes,

Vanessa

Hi Lottie,

Thank you for your comment.

Not only are you not alone, you are courageous in speaking out. You help other women know that they are not alone as well. Whether surgery is something that is chosen or not, it is not about perfection.

As you put it best, it is about the quality of YOUR life, not mine or anybody else's.

You are correct that the stigma around these procedures only spreads misinformation and prevents women from speaking out, fearing they will be chastised or judged.

In the end, by you educating yourself first, you can decide what is right for you and your body.

There are millions of women and men that have elective surgery every year, because they want. And millions that choose not to. Neither group is right or wrong.

This site exists to help women like you and the others looking to make informed decisions (whether that means having a surgery or not). As I have said before, this is a safe place to ask questions and share advice...

Not to be judged or to go through this process feeling alone, ashamed and uninformed.

We wish you the best.

Vanessa Scott

Thank you Lottie.

Please do not hesitate to let me know if you have questions.

Keep doing your research. And remember, you deserve the best, we all do!



Wishing you health & lots of happiness,

Vanessa

The recovery has a lot to do with the way you care for the area, your pain tolerance, your health and of course your doctor. Surgery is surgery. There is some discomfort naturally. The amount depends on you and your doctor's skill/technique/experience.

I don't "chop lips up" and hopefully neither do surgeons offering these procedures. The amount reduced during a labiaplasty should be discussed with you and your surgeon. It is up to you to determine that.

But the truth is, based on what you have shared it may be best for you not to jump into any surgery. Especially if you are considering it for somebody else.

Good luck and keep doing your research!

Hello Janet,

Thank you for your comment and for having the courage to speak your mind/share your experience.

You make a very interesting point (about the stigma around Labioplasty). I would have to agree that this level of scrutiny or mistaken conclusion only leads women (ones w/similar issues you described) to not discuss these issues openly.

Consequently, putting them at a greater risk to seeing or speaking with the wrong surgeon (that may not be truly equipped to help).

Out of desperation and embarrassment, they are not comfortable talking with other females or educating themselves appropriately for fear of being chastised or labeled as weak & insecure.

When in actuality labiaplasty can be likened to blepharoplasty (eye lid surgery), breast reduction and rhinoplasty. For some it is purely cosmetic and for many there is a functional/physical component.

With that said, the best thing for you or any woman is to educate herself on all the possible outcomes and ways to move forward intelligently & SAFELY.

Therefore to answer your question, it would depend on what you mean "declare it"? Do you mean for health care or if people ask?

Please let me know what you meant and that will give me a better idea.

Kind regards,

Vanessa

Hi Jane,

Thank you for your comment and sharing your experience.

Though this may have been a very traumatic experience for you, know that one person's opinion should never determine the level of your happiness. We are all different anatomically (nose, ears, hair, breast, etc.).

It sounds like your ex-partner was really not worthy of you and your body. Any person that would make such thoughtless comments are not just undeserving of you, they should not impact your self-esteem or your happiness.

There are many people that would find your labia perfect as they are. In fact, there are some men (&women) that really enjoy labia (all shapes & sizes).

With that said, if this is something you have decided for you, that is your choice. But keep in mind that nobody's opinion will ever matter more than yours. You cannot give your power or joy away to somebody else or you will never be "comfortable with your own body".

We all deserve to be happy. But you will never find happiness in anybody outside of you.

I wish you the best and that you find what you are looking for!!



Vanessa Scott

Hi Shandell,

Thank you for your comment.

Aside from you being young in age, it seems that this issue is also due to lack of experience.

Why would you describe your vagina as "hideous"?

Anyone that would make "fun" of you for any reason is clearly not worthy of being intimate with you now or ever. That behavior not only sounds highly immature, it makes me wonder the depth of the relationship.

There are plenty of men and women that love labia (as you can read by the comment below), all sizes.

WE are all different and unique. WE must embrace that if anyone is ever going to truly appreciate you...

If you start letting other people dictate to you your beauty or self-worth now, when will it stop?

Vanessa

Thanks for sharing Maxim. I appreciate you sharing your opinion and only validating that men (& women) love labia (all shapes, lengths & sizes).

Though some women may be concerned with what their partner will think, nobody should ever do something to please other people. These decisions and options are about a woman's body and her right to choose for HERSELF (whether to have or not have surgery), not about what somebody else likes or dislikes.

Similar to how I am sure you don't shave your hair, pierce your scrotum or get circumcised because a woman prefers it. You make choices that you want for you, not to make sure your girlfriend or wife approves, right?



Thanks again!

Vanessa

Hi Isha,

Thank you for your questions.

It is good that you have spoken with your mother as she may know firsthand what you are experiencing (genetically).

There is a misconception that protruding labia (past majora) is caused by sex or masturbation, but it has more to do with age, hormones, genetics, etc. Labia come in all different shapes, sizes, lengths and color. As the image above indicates.

Remember we are all different, so what is normal or "common" for me, may not be normal for you and vice versa.

Hope that helps!

Please let me know if you have any other questions.

Vanessa

Hello Chloe,

Thanks for your comment. I appreciate you sharing your experience.

As you know labia come in all different shapes and sizes. So there is nothing for you to feel "ashamed" about.

In regards to labiaplasty, why did you go to a hospital and not a specialist? How old are you now?

let me know.

Vanessa

Hi Chloe,

Thanks for your response.

So does it cause pain or is it more the appearance that bothers you?

Regardless of when or how you go forward with the procedure, it is definitely best to see a specialist. They will have the appropriate training, skill and experience. You want someone that knows what they are doing down there!